Hurricane Sandy was barreling towards the coast and the news reports were grim. This would be the worst storm to hit the Northeast region since,…
Personal effectiveness
Take Your Life Back
The waiter was halfway through taking my family’s order when his manager called him away. “Where did the waiter go?” Sophia, our seven-year-old, asked. Daniel,…
If You’re Too Busy to Meditate, Read This
This morning, like every morning, I sat cross-legged on a cushion on the floor, rested my hands on my knees, closed my eyes, and did…
How to Get a Raise When Budgets Are Tight
Tips on how to respond to workplace negativity
Working With People You Don’t Like Video
A Leader’s Imperative to Cut Through Clutter
Protect Your Sweet Spot
Who Are You Really Mad At?
A man and two children, a boy about nine and a girl about seven, were walking ahead of me in silence. The boy looked up…
The Best Strategy for Reducing Stress
Imagine you’re sailing in the Bahamas, sipping a cold drink and listening to the water lapping the sides of the boat. Relaxing, right? Not for…
Defend Your Sweet Spot
Spending time on projects that he considered unimportant was driving Carlos* insane. Carlos is an excellent leader. He’s turned around every business that he’s led…
The Emotional Adventure of Leadership
I was lost. I looked at the map and my heart raced as I admitted to myself — only to myself — that I had…
What’s On Your To-Don’t List?
When the first iPad came out, I bought it, became obsessed, and, within two weeks, returned it. Why did the obsession wear off so quickly? It…
How to Speak More Strategically
It had been three weeks since my throat started to feel sore, and it wasn’t getting better. The pain was most acute when I spoke.…
Do You Know What You Are Feeling?
Over the 23 years since we met, my wife Eleanor and I have spent considerable time, money, and energy on our development. Individually and together,…
A Super-Efficient Email Process
“Here’s my problem with email,” Jane*, a lawyer friend of mine told me recently, “I open Outlook expecting to quickly check my email, but then…
The Challenge: Do One Emotionally Difficult Thing Every Day
The email was compelling–a personal note from Jared*, a man I like and respect. He had taken over from me as president of the board…
Coping with Email Overload
A few weeks ago, I returned from a week-long technology-free vacation with my family. No computer, no phone, no email. When I got to the…
How to Respond to Emotional Outbursts
“Please, Daddy, please? Can we open our presents from you now?” It was the third night of Hanukkah and my wife Eleanor, our three young…
Do You Need a Checkup?
I had been feeling a little odd; a number of minor physical discomforts were leading me to feel anxious about my health in general. And…
How to Attend a Conference as Yourself
I often feel awkward when I go to a conference. Reluctant to sidle up to a stranger and introduce myself, I roam, like I did…
The Problem with High Expectations
At 5 am I was lying in bed, awake, thinking. Actually, thinking is too generous a word for what I was doing. I was perseverating.…
How to Start the Big Project You’ve Been Putting Off
I want to write a screenplay. I wanted to write one last year, but other work took more time than I expected, and I kept…
The Biggest Myth in Time Management
Brad* is as hard a worker as anyone I know. He’s not just busy, he’s keenly focused on getting the right things done. And it…
Keeping Resolutions: How to Focus on What’s Important
Do People Really Want You to Be Honest?
My wife Eleanor and I were walking up a mountain road, enjoying a rare moment of being alone together. As we rounded a bend, we…
Your Problem Isn’t Motivation
“Peter,” my friend Byron emailed me a few days ago. “I haven’t been diligent about working out over the past five years and I’m trying…
When Nothing Works
I’d had tendinitis in my elbow for over a year. Even something as gentle as twisting a doorknob made me wince in pain. I went…
Restore Yourself to Your Factory Default Settings
My wireless connection to the internet had suddenly stopped working. At first I was frustrated — I had been in the middle of browsing some…
How to Avoid Becoming a Person You Hate
I was so angry my whole body was shaking. I stared at Günther* with hate, my left hand in a fist and my right hand…
FAQs about 18 Minutes
Over the last few weeks several people have sent me questions about 18 Minutes and using the 18 Minutes process. Rather than answer each person…
How to Really Listen
One morning, my wife Eleanor woke up, turned over, and said, “I am not looking forward to this day.” I asked her why. What came…
What’s Your One Big Theme?
Rosh Hashanah is the Jewish new year, the time when we think about our past year and plan for our next. What do I want…
Want to Succeed? Stop Trying So Hard
“What’s eight times eight?” I asked Isabelle, my 9-year-old daughter who was practicing her times tables. Her eyes glazed over. We were on a plane…
The Right Way to Come Back From Vacation
“Daddy, come look at our island! Quick! Before it disappears!” We were in Bluffton, South Carolina playing on a sandbar that emerges only at low…
Who’s on Your Fridge?
I was lifting weights at my gym, a community center in New York City, when he caught my attention. His name, I later found out,…
Three Questions that Help Me Live a Fulfilling Life
I am on a plane with my wife Eleanor as we fly back from our once-a-year-without-children vacation. It was, for us, the perfect week. After…
How to Stay Focused on the Important Things
“I want to pass something by you,” I said to my friend Jori* who has lost 80 pounds over the past six months. “Our ability…
TEDx Flint: Peter Bregman Talks About Living with Your Hands off Your Ears
The Big Test: How to Handle Performance Pressure
“Ugh!” I put my hands on my head and looked away from my computer at the ceiling. “I can’t do…
Should Steve Jobs be more apologetic?
Should Steve Jobs be more apologetic? THE PROBLEM When Apple’s Steve Jobs made a public statement on problems with the iPhone 4 and how the…
Why Friends Matter at Work and in Life
Susan Harrison, my mother in law, died several months ago after a long and courageous battle with cancer. Like most…
How (and Why) to Stop Multitasking
During a conference call with the executive committee of a nonprofit board on which I sit, I decided to send…
A Two-Step Plan for Changing Your Bad Habits
I was on my cell talking with someone about something — I can’t remember who or what anymore — as…
How (and When) to Motivate Yourself
I woke up this morning to pouring rain and temperatures in the low 40s. I had planned on going for…
The Mostly Unplugged Vacation
I’m going on vacation with my family in a few weeks, and I’m anxious. Anyone who knows me knows how…
For 2010, think of self-reliance as progress
New York (CNN) — In last year’s futuristic movie, “Wall-E,” human beings, evacuated from an uninhabitable Earth, now live in a space station, confined to hover…
To Get What You Want, Don’t Go With Your Gut
About five years ago I took on a new client in New York City. This company had lawsuits against it,…
You May Be Hiding the Secret to Your Success
I was having lunch with a friend of mine, a man who has been very successful in business. Deeply generous,…
Want to Keep Your Job? Stop Trying to Fit In
I was running along the six-mile loop in Central Park on a cold winter day when I passed the southern…